Many moons ago, when Mr. SIG and I first got married,
we were excited to have children.
Right out of the gate, we were pregnant.
A honeymoon baby.
It was a surprise, in a way.
I mean, how many people get pregnant the first time they try?
We did!
And we were in love w/ our little "onesie".
Boy, were we ever in love.
Life was perfect.
For the next 3 weeks anyway.
Then I started to spot.
We got to see our "onesie" and nothing seemed wrong.
So I was put on bed rest.
But the spotting didn't stop.
And so another ultrasound was ordered.
This time, we heard news we didn't like.
The baby's sac was too small.
It was likely that we would lose "onesie".
As luck would have it, only 8 hours later,
I began to cramp severely.
We rushed to the ER.
We hoped.
We prayed.
We cried.
And we waited.
Waited for another ultrasound.
When it finally happened,
our sweet "onesie" no longer had a heartbeat.
Devastation.
Pure, complete unadulterated sadness.
I had never loved something so deeply.
And he was gone.
I was 8 weeks along.
Not enough time.
Nothing I could do to save my baby.
The coming months were very difficult for us.
We kept trying and trying to get pregnant again.
It didn't happen.
Meds and other medical interventions were tried.
Finally, after 20 months, we chose to do invitro.
And we prayed to be given two babies,
one to fill the place of our beloved "onesie".
Alas, our prayers were answered,
in the form of THREE.
Not in my wildest dreams would I have imagined this.
But I wouldn't have it any other way.
I love my babies really, 4 makes them kids but i don't care, haha
with all my heart and my soul.
I would die for them.
And although I am still sad that we never got to meet "onesie",
one day I know I will see our beautiful child again.
His sacrifice allowed us to have Sofi, Ian, and Gabi.
Our loss was also our gain.
Funny how things work?
And along the way, I met MANY other beautiful women
that have endured loss during pregnancy.
Some, over and over again.
Some actually getting to meet their angel.
Some that are still without a child to this day.
This will always be near and dear to my heart.
I would not wish this on my worst enemy.
{good thing i don't have many...or maybe any}
Loss is heartbreaking.
When I have a chance to do something to honor this,
I jump at the chance.
Whether it is to raise money for a funeral,
make a graphic "siggy" used in forums,
make blinkies,
or in this case...subway art,
I don't hesitate.
{click on image to enlarge to 8x10 printable}
Thank you Augie for the suggestion.
Thank you to all the ladies that shared this on Facebook.
I wish I didn't have to make it.
But I'm glad that I could.
For all you angel mommies out there,
whether you frame this or put it in a scrapbook of your angel,
or any other beautiful thing you want to do with it,
I hope it helps...just a wee little bit.
LOVE YOU ALL!
1 comment:
I wish to god this didn't speak to me, but it does. Thank you for creating this, there aren't that many out there.
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